I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
im drinking this country out of the recession.
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
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