My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Randomize
