Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize
