let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
So much Jack, so little girl.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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