Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
