Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
