I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
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