Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Randomize
