Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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