I am spending my child support on dildos
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
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