Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
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