So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize
