Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
