I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
