so that wasnt chicken after all
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Randomize
