Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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