Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
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