love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
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