I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize