It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
two words: eviction party
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
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