Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
