hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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