Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
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