like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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