I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
Randomize
