no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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