No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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