so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
So I just went to clothing optional bar
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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