Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
