Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
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