he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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