I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
Randomize
