is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
