Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
he was CRYING into my vagina
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
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