Cold hands, warm shart.
Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
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