Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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