Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
