Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
