if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
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