We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
