sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
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