? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
Randomize
