He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
