So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Randomize