well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
