Need sex. Gaining weight.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
