are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Randomize
