Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
