Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
