I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
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